Between Friends

Darling it’s been quite some time, would you tell me how you are?

My mind has been racing and I’ve been erasing everything you’ve said to me.

Eyes glow and lips know just how much silence can fill this room.

Feelings within me have carved art in these walls,

But that’s all history now, it’s just history now.

Like a museum, these fixtures will remain engraved in my bones for all to see.

On a pedestal, middle ground, nothing has never been this simple.

You entered, you left, you came and now you’re gone.

It’s so real, it’s tragic, the consequences and

Wondering what we could’ve been, it’s so sad.

Stains on cigarettes tell me you’ve moved on,

so I want to be your lighter, let me be your lighter.

Something has gotten into me and now I know,

I might never love again, for I’d drown in you.

People move on and people find new people.

But between friends it shouldn’t matter at all.

 

Xx Sarah

 

 

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Mystically

Phantoms of past show me the way,

To which my heart desires to go.

Pathways align beneath my feet,

In hopes I’ll see the light ahead.

Meeting new people can bring passion,

It’s those who bury my dreams I rid.

Sometimes I sit alone in silence,

And wonder why it’s so violent.

The emptiness creates a void,

But none of these feelings I avoid,

For without the hardships,

These words would never come from my lips.

Your ears are precious matters,

And my thoughts infinitely scatter,

Through and through the tides.

 

Xx Sarah

 

Salvation

Rage against life in the simplest of ways.

Enaging integrity and the sun.

A former bond has come and we repent.

With nothing to spare, we didn’t break – we bent.

Tell tales of misery captivate our subconcious mind.

A light, a light, a rejuvenation age of life.

Words flow like paper planes.

Like the blood rushing in our veins.

Sliding by pretending consequences are extinct.

Sounds of our creations overpower the loud call of sorrow.

Be strong and mighty, be anything but counterfeit.

Living with broken wings, it’s not your fault – any of it.

Left, right, left – conditioning never seemed so cruel.

The weapon has less value than any intentions.

Speculate and determine the path in the plot.

Seek ahead, the past came and you fought.

Universe in favour and the stars have aligned.

The dagger of darkness cut deeper than a knife.

Tell tales of misery captivate our subconcious mind.

A light, a light, a rejuvenation age of life.

Xx Sarah

Stay The Same

Coming up on the other side,

I saw your fears and showed you mine.

We ran forever to infinity,

And for once, you were my family.

Jaded eyes never shut,

A close encounter, just our luck.

I promise you I’ll never leave,

It’s not you, it’s not naive.

Cotton candy skies will make you wonder,

Why it gets dark and has to thunder.

Though without a storm, we would not grow,

We would not go, we would not know.

We never made a pact so strong,

Without one of us being strung along,

I need your wisdom like you need mine,

Like we promised for the billionth time.

From earth to space, it’s just a game,

Running down fields, glad they came.

Afterall, seasons change,

But you and I will stay the same.

Xx Sarah

A Place To Call Home

Lost and found

is where my mind goes

when you tell me one,

one too many lies.

Tick tock, a secondhand nature

breaks us down

in orderly fashion

for the rest to bury us.

Ever changing life

sets us up for heartbreak,

strife, and a place,

a place to call home.

Reliance on others

is not what we do

but in fact what we

feel we need.

Don’t you fall,

a beauty in the night.

We need to be strong,

we need to keep up the fight.

 

Xx Sarah

 

A Broken Bond

How highly I think of you is terrible.

 

Youth slipping away from the fountain,

my finger tips frozen.

Pushed up against the wall, dewey eyes,

I wait for you to come in.

Grass stains on my knees in a patch like pattern,

I pull the roots from under your feet.

You go flying around and around,

Spinning like saturn.

You ignore the signals I send,

Turning back into the storm.

I’m swinging from a tree vine,

Barely hanging on, a hand you should lend.

It could be the silence in your voice,

The way your body moves but,

All I know is how to hold your hand

Like the first time we made the choice.

We fell into the rabbit hole,

and came out two separate lives.

Just one more time to hold your hand,

One more time to touch your soul.

Silver is not turning to gold,

A line in the dark to never be seen,

I want to be someone you miss,

I want to be the one you want to hold.

 

Xx Sarah

 

 

 

Sandstorm

Dear whom it may concern: Thanks for helping me forget the world for a night. It was cool. If only I could see you again. Take care.

 

A lust like ours was rare,

It came so fast and left even quicker.

We held on too tight, let too much out,

And we left faster than ever.

Came on a little too strong,

The stars had never shined so bright,

Together as one,

We danced closely all night.

A sandstorm hit in those few hours,

and built a sand castle where we stood.

It all came crashing down,

You didn’t try to save it but I knew we could.

It’s a cat and mouse game,

A goldfish would never win.

Right there, right here, it was so easy,

But for me, you never let me in.

 

Xx Sarah

 

 

 

 

 

 

On The Off Chance

On the off chance you’re listening,

There’s a few things you should know,

I admire the things you’ve done for me,

For those things have helped me grow.

 

On the off chance you’re on your way,

There’s a space made up just for you,

Fluffed pillows and your favorite soup,

Won’t you promise you’ll stay an hour or two?

 

On the off chance you stopped for gas,

There’s a time for you to think of what we could be.

A girl in a sundress, a boy in a beanie,

Just a wave along the shore, a never-ending sea.

 

On the off chance you turned around,

There’s a lonely girl just miles away,

With a heart full of love, eyes filled with fear,

Cold soup, a pillow and a place for you to stay.

 

On the off chance I’m over you,

There’s something you should know,

The tears were not worth the time you gave me,

I’ll never forget what we had, but it’s time to let you go.

 

S. K. Young

Medicine

I told myself I would stop.

Stop loving you the way I shouldn’t.

But it’s too late, the door has closed,

The cold air came and numbed my toes.

A vicious circle as the call it,

No reasons why.

I reach for you while fighting the urge,

As one I wish we were able to merge.

You’re my medicine,

my safe from every battle.

Saving me from the disparity,

helping to see what’s right there infront of me.

 

S. K. Young

Chocolate Is Another Word For Her

Chocolate is just a friend you say,

It isn’t something you crave to touch,

it isn’t something you want everyday.

Brushing it off, it’s all I can do,

You drop everything in time when chocolate comes around.

I can’t help but think it’s destroying you.

Maybe just a taste, you said couldn’t hurt,

like a thousand knives within my soul,

heart crushed down, soft like dirt.

Chocolate is pretty, chocolate is smooth,

something we both know I’m not,

but really,

it’s only you that’s going to lose.

 

Xx Sarah

Just

Connected as one, finally together,
A love lost, a love won, but not even a love at all,
We fall and break, we push and pull.

Just a feeling that will never leave my bones.
I don’t even know why, is this even love?
And everytime I look at you, it’s in sephia tones.

Reasons are unknown for this everlasting lust,
It’s in the way you look at me,
It’s in the way you trust.

Just a feeling is all we say,
A twist in turn, a twist in fate,
Allow flying colours come out to play.

Though we may live our seperate lives,
It’s never too late to give it a chance,
It’s never too late to try.

So with this poem I wrote for you,
I just hope you remember me,
And I just hope I’ll remember you too.

 

Xx Sarah

Falling With Nowhere To Go

Falling with nowhere to go,

The ground never seemed so far,

Don’t let this down, don’t let this crumble,

Hearts racing faster than a race car.

Hands within reach,

Face slowly burning up,

Glances makes us wonder,

Darling, will this ever be enough?

Gentle whispers and vacant sounds,

Heart pounds, pounds, pounds,

it’s hard to focus on what’s real,

Mixed signals have never been so loud.

Friends as they call it,

Quotations or not,

Define us from now til death,

Lust is contagious, a silly thing we’ve caught.

Leave now or forever more,

A feeling I never thought would come around,

Caring for you has brought faith,

Oh darling, just let us have a taste.

That last goodbye was hard enough,

A laugh, a glance, a hug was all,

Darling, our lips did not touch,

It was you, it was me, it was us who made me fall.

Xx Sarah

Poem: Settle The Score

This idea came to me recently when having a conversation about life with someone I barely know. Enjoy.

 

It’s a never ending battle,

one we’ll never win,

the storm seems everlasting,

when did it even begin?

 

It’s never enough for you,

your tiny little hands,

the weight of the world is too heavy,

for you to even stand.

 

It’s life in a bottle,

the sand in your toes,

the rain that falls,

and the snow that blows.

 

It’s a mysterious puzzle,

this thing that we call life,

we all learn to defend,

through all the pain and strife.

 

It’s a never ending battle,

one we’ll never win,

the storm seems everlasting,

when did it even begin?

 

Thanks for reading.

Xx Sarah

Poem: Old Faces

Bittersweet smiles and longing eyes

Fill the streets of once upon a time.

Nostalgic voices chitter chatter,

Yet, not even making a sound.

Loving arms welcome a many,

Tired footsteps take us home.

You were there, making an entrance,

the only thing I actually noticed.

Grooving, swinging, to the beat,

It seems we lost sight of what’s to be.

I say hello and long for you,

But it’s too late, you’re a man of wonder.

Memories creep back into my head,

I reason that I should let go.

Cotton candy and popcorn smells,

fill the air as I turn around.

I left you years ago, it must happen again,

So nice to know that your life’s began.

A smile can hide so much more,

when old faces creep at the door.

 

Hope this brings back some nostalgic feelings for you in one way or another. Have a wondeful Sunday!

Xx Sarah

 

 

Understanding Adoption: Part 3

The hardest part about being adopted for me is knowing next to nothing about the life my mother lived. I wonder all the time what her favorite food is or what place she finds peace in when she is stressed. What about her favorite books, movies and places to shop? Every little detail is important to me.

To not understand fully the reasons I couldn’t stay with her is hard as well. I know deep down all the little things she is make up who I am so I’ll always have a part of her with me. It’s funny because most mothers and daughters look similar so I like to look in the mirror and try to picture what she might look like.

I do know that she loved music, poetry and to cook – three things I am very passionate about. Maybe that’s why concerts are my happy place. Maybe how I took piano lessons. That poetry is something I love to read and write. And that cooking is relaxing and has always been a big part of my life.

When I first found out all of these things, it made me smile because I realized my mom now loves to cook – she owned a restaurant and a food shop when I was much younger. My mom loves to read and she plays piano very well.

Considering how it all ties together, it’s clear to see that my birth mother chose my parents because of their interests and warm loving spirit.

Thanks for reading.

Xx Sarah

 

PART 1

https://bloglostandfound.wordpress.com/2014/05/25/understanding-adoption-part-1/

PART 2

https://bloglostandfound.wordpress.com/2014/06/25/understanding-adoption-part-2/

Personal Story

https://bloglostandfound.wordpress.com/2013/08/22/adoption-a-personal-story/

 

The Liebster Award

I woke up this morning to find I was nominated for The Liebster Award. This award generally goes out to smaller, newer blogs.

I started up Lost & Found a year ago and never imagined the joy and support it has brought into my life. My intention was to release unwanted feelings until I realized I had gained somewhat of a following. And this goes out to all my readers: thank you so much for appreciating the words I type. To know that I have inspired even one person means the absolute world to me.

I’d like to give an even bigger thank you to Pieces of Bipolar who was gracious enough to include me on her list of nominees for this award. She has shown me support for awhile now and I am so forever grateful for the kind words she has motivated me with. Please check out her blog and show her some love.

 

The Liebster Award:

1. Thank the person who nominated you.

I expressed my gratitude above but thank you again so much to Pieces of Bipolar for enjoying my words enough to nominate me for such an incredible thing.

2. Add the Liebster Award logo to your blog.

Posted here: Awards

3. Answer 10 questions provided to you from the person who nominated you.

See my answers below this list. I changed one question from the previous post.

4. Provide 10 or ask your nominees to answer the same questions.

For my nominee(s), please answer the same as I have5. Nominate bloggers of your own for the award.

See nominees below the questions I have answered.

 

Questions:

1. If you were stranded on an island and only had three things, what would they be?

Music. Tent. Unlimited food.

2. If you won the lottery, what would you do with the money?

Frist, pay off my parents mortgage, donate to charity, then travel the world and go to as many concerts and music festivals as I can.

3. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I would give myself an extra boost of confidence.

4. If you could try something new today, what would it be?

Parasailing.

5. What is your life mantra?

Any of Paulo Coelho’s quotes would work. The one below sticks out the most:

“Everything tells me that I am about to make a wrong decision, but making mistakes is just a part of life. What does the world want of me? Does it want me to take no risks, to go back to where I came from because I didn’t have the courage to say “yes” to life?” – Paulo Coelho, Eleven Minutes

6. What is your biggest fear in life?

Not living every day to the fullest.

7. If you could have dinner with one person alive or dead, who would it be and why?

My birth mother. I want to know what could’ve been and I want to know her story better and understand everything she has been through.

8. What is one thing you’re proud of?

My ablility to keep going when people doubt what I’m capable of.

9. What is the most beautiful place you’ve seen?

So many places. As of right now, the country side and mountains of Ireland.

10. Name a song that describes your life in a nutshell.

As some of you know, I’m a music junkie. I like everything. Anything. So therefore, there are probably hundreds of songs that would be suitable for this. Each song has something different to offer for each aspect of my life. With that said, I’ll share with you a song that never fails to make me feel better and is definitely in my top 5:

Sanctuary – Paradise Fears

 

Nominess:

**Each of the blogs below have either inspired, motivated or opened my eyes and mind to another side of life. I hope they accept this award as a thank you from me for putting their writing and thoughts on the web.**

1.  Faqeeha Aleem

2. New York Insomniac

3. The Reckless Romantic

 

 

 

 

 

Poem: As I Sit Here

As I sit here, I think to myself,

Wondering if there’s a way for me to help.

You walk away, sadden and all,

Stopping in your tracks, you begin to fall.

My hand it holds the back of your head,

guiding you to and away from dread.

With every heartbeat there’s whispers and stares,

In all honestly, who the hell really cares.

Flowers and wine, a cold winter’s night,

Are all the things, you told me to fight.

From smiles and laughter, and wooden tables,

Our time together was nothing but fables.

As I sit here, I come out of this dream,

You’re walking towards me, could this be a dream?

 

Thanks for reading. Happy Friday!

Xx Sarah

I Am Only Me

You like to talk about yourself,

never asking how I am

or what I’m feeling.

I’ll always be waiting for you

to come around,

when I know that’s impossible.

For you took the key to me

and threw it over the edge

of the deepest falls in your soul.

Making my decisions around plans

to shut others out

when they only want in.

I am left here alone

never knowing what else could be.

Thanks to you, I sit and poder

of how I can get you to want me

like you did before.

But it’s no use

because you are a king

and I am only me.

 

Thanks for reading.

Xx Sarah

 

Poem: Up In The Air

So early never to know,

Just where my heart is telling me to go.

Ponder and wait for the moment of life,

My heart beats loudly through pain and through strife.

Traffic and people fill the scene,

The most content the city has ever seen.

Rows of orange, lines of yellow,

The night time reaches a mood of mellow.

Hands in the air for all to see,

Clink of glasses between you and me.

Honk honk honk – the city roars,

Pushing through people, opening doors.

Loud screams and happy faces,

Oh darling, it’ll take you places.

From east to west and north to south,

Wide smiles painted on your mouth.

Time oh time, flies on by,

Birds a soaring way up high.

We become humble as the day ends,

The way the sky fades and the sun begins to descend.

 

Thanks for reading. Have a good one.

Xx Sarah

Poem: All That Life Offers

To think we are
who we are
but not even know
who we are,
is a funny thing
that life offers.
While we may be lost,
we are always found
just waiting for that
moment of realization
of who we truly are.
We live for others
more than ourselves
but maybe that’s how
life is meant to be.
Searching and seeking,
we never seem to find
just what we are looking for.
Heads held high in the moonlight,
umbrellas held higher as the sky begins to cry.
To think we are
who we are
but not even know
who we are,
is a funny thing
that life offers.

Thanks for reading. More poetry will be up soon.

Xx Sarah