Understanding Adoption: Part 2

Last month I posted my first segment to this series, which you can read HERE. If you’re a fairly new reader then I suggest you also read my personal story to gain background knowledge of my situation.

On the TV show The Foster’s the main characters are brought in and out of foster care and eventually into a lovely family who embrace them with open arms but of course there’s a lot of heartbreak and rebellious nature. The kids don’t know where they’ll end up in the future so everything that could go wrong, goes wrong and even worse. My point is that some adopted children do not bond well their adoptive families and or silblings.

For myself, I’ve been very fortunate to not have been in foster care. And lucky for me, my brother is also adopted which I think made the whole situation easier as we grew up. It’s common to hear stories about the adopted child in the family feeling out of place and not fitting in with their OWN family. It’s heartbreaking actually. Bonding and growing close was very easy because of the warm welcoming I’ve grown up with.

hanz

Also, one other thing that bothers me about telling people I’m adopted is when they suddenly look sad or feel concerened and sympathetic and I’ll tell you why.

Half the time, people don’t know the story at all and assume it’s bad. Deep down I know they might be trying to comfort me but it really doesn’t at all. It makes me feel the opposite. Don’t get me wrong, I used to get very emotional talking about this and I have no idea why but it just makes it harder to talk about my story. I know what I’m about to say isn’t true but when people get sympathetic over this kind of thing, it makes me feel they don’t view me as a strong person. I’ve talked to a few others who have been adopted as well and they all feel the same way even if their story was rougher than someone else’s.

Listen, my birth mother who I love dearly (though have never met), isn’t a bad person or a bad mother. She didn’t abort me. She didn’t leave me on the side of a dirt road in the middle of nowhere. She gave me life because she wanted me to experience happiness and joy or so that’s how I look at it.

Thanks for reading.

Look for Part 3 next month.

Xx Sarah

 

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4 thoughts on “Understanding Adoption: Part 2

  1. Thank you for sharing your story Sarah. It is refreshing to know that there are positive experiences with adoption, seeing as the media always shows us the negatives ones. When I read the first part in May more than sadness, sympathy, or concern I felt an overwhelming sense of interest and curiosity. Adoption, in my experience, is not something that most people talk about openly and to many of them it is a sensitive topic. The fact that you are sharing is appreciated and I look forward to more of your stories and brilliant writing.

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