Adoption: A Personal Story

“When she looks in the mirror, we want our daughter to know herself. It’s hard to face the world when you don’t know where your face came from.” – Unknown

Adoption is a wonderful thing this world has to offer but people don’t understand how much emotional impact it can have on another. It can bring one joy, yet pain. Love, yet hate. Take a second to read my thoughts.

If you’ve known me for more than a few years then I assume you would know I was adopted. I have never openly talked about my story with the public before, but I think it’s time now.

First of all, I was adopted right from birth into a family who has shown me love and taught me all the necessities in life – from love to forgiveness to responsibility to independence and more. Second, I was never comfortable talking about being adopted until I was in grade 11 or 12. Before then, I would get emotional and shut down whenever I was asked about it – almost feeling embarrassed and I don’t know why. Now if asked about it, I am more than happy to share my thoughts.

The number one question I’m always asked is: At what age were you told? Honestly, it’s a funny question because I don’t know at what age exactly. I’ve known for as along as I can remember and I thank my parents very much for not hiding it because I’ve heard stories where people don’t find out until they are 40 and it tears the family apart. Also, I’m so used to it by now that sometimes I don’t even remember I am adopted.

When I was younger, around the age 8-11, I used to be almost ashamed to go out in public with my parents because of how different we look. My parents are both pretty white, while I’m a tan color… (See picture below).

563365_10150885448446965_468122158_n

I also have a brother (below) who is adopted as well and it’s funny because he and I look like we could be blood related siblings when in fact, we are not.

426944_10150885448201965_1853356242_n

I used to also get feelings of neglect, shame, sadness and more from wondering why on Earth my mom didn’t want me (this was before I was told why). But then I would feel wanted, joy and happiness because of the wonderful people who took me into their arms and saved me from living a terrible life. If I had not been adopted, who knows what would have happened. It’s a scary reality to think about.

I’m not going to get into the details of why my biological mother put me up for adoption because that’s something I’d like to keep out of this post. Plus, even though I haven’t met her yet, I’d like to respect my birth mom’s privacy for now. I’m planning to share it in the future though. Part of the reason why she gave me up was because of cultural reasons and family issues. But if you know me pretty well and want to know, message me, and I’ll tell you the full story. It is rather interesting… Notice how I only talk about my mom? Yeah. That’s where it get’s interesting.

My parents told me they never met her. They say she was a very private person. I don’t even know her name. But she left me a hand written card with a special message that is very close to my heart. There was also a document explaining her hobbies and interest which happen to be similar to mine. I thought that was pretty cool.

I’m currently in the process of finding her. I would love nothing more in this world than to meet my mom. Meeting her before I’m 30 is something I plan to do and I can’t wait to share it with all of you. I was nervous at first to tell my parents that I really wanted to meet my birth mother because I thought they would feel sad or unappreciated, but that was not the case at all. They assured me this is something they hope I accomplish, and that makes me very happy.

I also plan on adopting children when I’m ready for kids in my life. I am very blessed and would love to make other children feel as loved as I do today. And I hope this post opens your eyes about how it can affect someone.

Thanks. If you’ve read this far, you’re awesome and it means so much to me that you took time out of your day to read this.

Xx Sarah

Advertisements

35 thoughts on “Adoption: A Personal Story

  1. I am also adopted and while reading this we have a alot in common with dealing with it and etc. I would honestly LOVE to hear now about your story and maybe share mine. It’s not every day where you meet someone and they truthfully say “I understand” so email me when you get a chance? Ashleybro08@gmail.com.

    1. Thank you so much for your kind comment. Thanks for reading. I’m happy you enjoyed what I had to say. I’ll be talking more about adoption in the near future so keep a look out for that. Have a wonderful day!

  2. This is such a wonderful post, so honest and raw. Thank you for sharing! My mom was adopted, so I have a lot of respect for people who have been touched by it. Mom met her biological parents after she got married to my dad, and they’re really close now. Best of luck!

    1. Thank you so so much. I’m really glad you enjoyed it. That’s amazing to hear and I can only hope I have a similar experience with my mom. I’m definitely going to have more posts on adoption in the future.

      1. To be honest I never have had a reason to think about doing it for real. Sure, I have thought about what they might look like or if I would feel some sort of connection but in the end my parents are my parents. I have a sister who is also adopted (we aren’t biologically related) so I guess that is another reason why I haven’t tried to make contact, my sister really wanted to meet her biological parents and found out not to long ago her B-mom had passed away it was quite upsetting for her. In the last few years and since my A-dad has passed away I’ve learned that I was a middle child out of 4 others and a few other things and that kinda made me angry because out of 4 kids I was given away? Affair I am guessing…just a guess. Anyways whatever you decide to do if you need any support I’m always around. Hang in there sweetie, love your blog btw! 🙂 ❤ K

      2. I am so sorry for the late reply! I saw your comment and forgot to reply. Wow, that’s a lot of emotions to go through. I have no idea what I want to do because I’m afraid that death will be in the answer when I go searching like your sister experienced.And thanks so much 😀 I see your email below, I’ll definitely shoot you an email later tonight or tomorrow with more info that I don’t want to express to the world yet. Xx

      3. I am so sorry, I actually wrote a reply to this days ago on the app from my phone and it said it had posted. When I didn’t hear from you I started to wonder. Feel free to email me any time at all, I am sorry this is getting to you so late. (totally feel you on the expressing to the world part too btw). 🙂 Hope you had a great holiday! ❤ K

    1. AWE! Thank you soooo much!! That was a wonderful comment to wake up to. I really appreciate your kind words. If/when I do meet her, I will definitely write about my experience! Have a wonderful day 😀

  3. Your story is warming, shows the prueness of you and the love you grew in, shows the hope and the love there is in a world that is far to often dark and full of shadows.
    When any innocent child is born, it needs to grow in light and love for the seeds of yesterday grown in the years to come, sadly my own childhood was dark, we grew in darkness and taken a while to twist that round and free myself!
    Nice to see the warmth in your post and the hope your words spring forth.

    Good lunch with your search am sure no matter where life leads you, the paths you follow will always bloom in light.

    1. Thank you so much. This comment means more to me than you’ll ever know. I also want to thank you for always reading and commenting on my blog. You motivate me to keep writing even when I’m having a bad day.

  4. hey sarah! great post – i just stumbled on your blog for the first time, i have some catching up to do!
    you’re a wonderful lady! 🙂

  5. Thanks so much for posting. As an adoptive mother of two (boy and girl), I always want to hear the adopted child’s side. If you have a moment, I’d love to hear about what your adoptive parents did right–the things that helped you through the tough times, especially pre-teen years, and (if you’re okay with it) maybe some things that would be good to avoid doing (not trying to start a family feud, though). If you already have a post about it, just let me know. If you have time to look through a couple of my posts, I’d love to hear what you have to say. Thanks again for posting!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s